Pre-Tish'ah B'Av Mourning

We have already seen how Ashkenazi tradition puts a heavy emphasis on custom. I have also shown how the millennia of persecution, have left a tragic legacy, where mourning rites were expanded greatly. This is especially true of Ashkenazim, where even joyous occasions usually have a bitter-sweet overtone. This is also true, to a lesser degree, among Sepharadim. The Talmudic rules for pre-Tish'ah B'av observance are few. But virtually all communities have expanded upon them. The halachic status of these is debatable. Some rabbis (mostly Ashkenazim, but not exclusively) insist on the customs as we find them; even those that came in during our grandparents lifetimes, while others urge the returning, to one degree or another, to the original practices. What does the Talmud say? There is no such thing as the "Three Weeks" (from Shiv'ah Asar B'Tammuz) in Talmud. Some mourning rules begin with the first of Av (the Nine Days" when we are urged to "diminish joy". One should not plant a garden that is for pleasure (rather than for food), or build an unessential building or addition to our homes, that are merely for pleasure. No weddings are to be held. It is also forbidden to buy new clothes. Most of the mourning rules begin only on the week when Tish'ah B'av occurs. So, if Tish'ah B'av falls on any day of the week from Sunday on, the rites only begin after Shabbat, until the actual day of Tish'ah B'Av. (The rabbis of a later era, debate the issue of a Tish'ah B'av that falls on Shabbat (like this year) but is observed on Sunday. Is "the week of Tish'ah B'av the entire week before, or non-existent? Most Ashkenazim hold the former, most Sepharadim hold the latter. No bathing is allowed. But this is interpreted differently. Some interpret it as any bathing as showering. Others interpret it as any bathing for pleasure, as opposed to cleanliness. Still others see it as forbidding only hot baths for pleasure, as the Talmud reads 'do not go into the bath house". No hair cutting is allowed. The Talmud forbids eating meat at the last meal before the fast (if that is a weekday). The drinking of wine is not forbidden, but became a feature of most communities' observances for this time of year. No wine is drunk for either the "nine days" or at least the week in which Tish'ah B'av occurs. Rabbi Ovadia Yosef writes that although most Sepharadic communities did not have this custom, it is, nevertheless, appropriate to observe. Most of these restrictions are observed by Ashkenazim from the First of Av,while Sepharadim only observe them Tishah B'Av occurs.Eating meat is the sole exception. Most Sepharadim refrain from the Second of Av. In Ashkenazi tradition,  the Talmudic  observances of the Nine Days are put all the way back to the 17th of Tammuz; especially weddings. Sepharadim only stop weddings from the first of Av, and have some room for leniency even in this. Sepharadim observe no mourning until the Second of Av. Ashkenazim refrain from hair cutting for the "three weeks"; Sepharadim keep the original "week in which Tish'ah B'av occurs". Also, Sepharadim do not apply this to women, while Ashkenazim do...Most Yemenites only refrain from meat at the last meal before the fast, if that occurs on a weekday. Ashkenazim do no laundry for the nine days; Sepharadim only on the week of Tish'ah B'av. Likewise for wearing freshly laundered garments. (Garments are put on and worn for a while before either the nine days, or the week of Tish'ah B'Av, and stored for use on these days. (Exclusive of Shabbat). No mention of music is found in the classic sources, but instrumental music was seen as similar to wedding celebrations, and a painful reminder of the loss of the Temple, where music was central. . Ashkenazim refrain for the three weeks; Sepharadim, have varying customs on this matter. I recently wrote about the fact that most Jews refrain also from recorded and broadcast music, but this practice is seen by many as baseless. I ignore it completely. other  than on Tish'ah B'Av itself.When Tish'ah B'Av occurs on Shabbat, Ashkenazim refrain from marital relations that Friday night (other than if it is the night of the woman's immersion), while Sepharadim do not refrain. Most communities observe some mourning rites on the day after Tish'ah B'av as well, particularly as regards meat and wine. . These vary greatly from community to community. Others consider this to be excessive. May G-d turn our mourning to joy!