Community part 1

Community is vital. In the famous story of Choni Hame'agel, in which he slept for seventy years and all his friends and family were already gone, He prayed "Either give me friendship or give me death". (I like that much better than Patrick Henry;s version). When my two oldest kids were little, someone gave them a gift of the biography of a famous rabbi. It said that this rabbi allegedly avoided having friends, because he feared that love of friends would take him away from love of G-d. To me, the love of friends is a central pillar in my life. I decided not to let my kids see that book. RAMBAM (Maimonides) writes that we gain our values primarily from out friends, and therefore we need to pick good ones. If our society fails in morality and ethics, move! If all societies are corrupt, go into the desert and live in a cave! Society can make us, and society can break us. it is a two edged sword. In Jewish society, there are many safe guards. The Torah requires us to look out for one another. The Torah tells us not to gossip, and to give everyone the benefit of the doubt.Two years ago I was ill, and was essentially bedridden for six months. When I finally began to recover, I still couldn't leave my home, as I could not negotiate the stairs. A generous man in the next town over heard about his, and spent $2,000 to build be a ramp! On the other hand, the Jewish community can be very judgmental if we fail to conform.In the early '80s. I lived in a community where nearly all the Jews voted for one party. When I registered to vote, i registered with the other party. The next day, I got an angry visit from one of the heads of the local Jewish community! This is wrong, and probably illegal. There is often criticism for one who keeps either a a lower or a higher standard of observance. Some (including yours truly) keep a low profile and a large degree of anonymity. We live at the periphery of the community, but avoid the ever present and ever shifting controversies. The fact that I lived in Israel for seventeen years, but returned because of extremely bad experiences, makes me persona non grata in many circles. I love Torah. I love Judaism. But sometimes the community is a great asset. Sometimes it is oppressive. These are my experiences. I will write more on this topic, but look forward to hearing your experiences with this as well.